Tuesday, January 27, 2009
As the self proclaimed leader of the Intergalactic Anti-Coon Force, I find it neccessary to outline proper behavior for those who consider themselves "Coon Free". Therefore I am demanding an immediate end to the following actions.
1) The white tee. Dammit that is an undershirt. That means that it goes under a shirt fool. It is not the main shirt, its a subshirt and as such should be on a sub-layer. Furthermore, your undershirt should not be longer than the over shirt. Get it together man.
2) The mohawk. Many great things came out of the 80's. Rakim, CD's, Def Jam, Nintendo, Me... The mohawk was not one of them. Especially since the majority of coons wearing this hairstyle refuse to comb their fucking hair. Look here you slovenly bastards, this is america and you have every right to look like an idiot, but at least be a neat idiot. I know yo mama had to teach you something in between homeboys in outer space and Cisco margaritas.
3) Baby Daddies/Mamas. If you ain't feelin each other wear a damn condom. I dont care about you havin random acts of sexy time. But be considerate, if you know you aint shit, and you know he/she aint shit, don't combine your wack ass forces to bring an heir to your lame ass misfortune into the world. And before some retarded ass Sith Coon Lord leaves me a comment talkin about condoms break or birth control isnt 100% effective think about this: 99% > 0% you simple bastard.
4) 30 year old aspiring rappers. And I'm being hella lenient. If yo ass has lived through more than two different presidents, and you still talking about "listen to my demo" or "check out my new tracks on myspace" unplug your computer, take that cord, scrape the plastic off, plug it back in and choke yourself electrically. Your time has passed and it would be prudent to consider a nice trade. I would suggest grave digging. That way you can save money when you kill yourself out of shame.
5) Dropping Out of High School. Nah this is not a PSA my spear chucking friend. Even drug dealers need a high school diploma now. You might as well have dropped out in kindergarten. Cause a high school diploma dont mean shit, and an 8th grade diploma means less than shit. You can't even work at McDonalds without a high school diploma. Do you understand what that shit means? You aint even qualified to push McGriddles my nigga. Good luck wit that demo.
6) Reppin for the hood. I'ma say this first, and maybe this will catch on. FUCK THE HOOD. FUCK HOOD NIGGAS, FUCK THE HOOD MENTALITY. That's some delusional ass thinking man. Fuck being proud of what you got, be proud of working to get more. Watch some clown with Coondows Vista brainwashing come up talkin about, "you forgot where you came from." NIGGA I WISH I COULD. Life in the hood is miserable, thats why people get money and MOVE OUT dumbass. I can't wait to be able to rep a place that coons ain't never heard of and cant get to because its out of the darklands.
7) Drug Dealers turned Rappers turned Political Scientist. Nigga shut up. Don't you try to tell me shit about africa, when the farthest you have been is Dolton. You aint thought about shit outside your neighborhood for 25 years, now all the sudden you're Young Kufi the Sociologist. Shut the fuck up and stick to snap music.
8) People complaining about foreigners opening businesses in their neighborhood. I don't care about your perspectives on how the koreans come in the hood and open up a store with $500, when you get your income tax (which has been padded by claiming kids that aint yours) and instead of investing, paying down your debt or using that money to start your own business, you go out and buy $1000 worth south pole jeans, some ugly ass dunks, 2 bottles of patron, and put a down payment on a an excursion. Meanwhile, Abu Graib over here is driving a 93 taurus and owns 3 restaurants, a nail shop, two cell phone places and a dollar store. But you flossy right? Dumbass.
9) Settling. Subjugation only last as long as you are submissive. Know why there was a boom of black business in the 60's? People were not settling for other people making money off them. Want to know why shorty's man treats her so well? Cause she won't put up with no bullshit and she lets him know it. Want to know why certain neighborhoods are clean, well lit, have nice parks and grocery stores that actually sell healthy food? Because the residents demand the best. As long as you don't stand for something you will fall for anything. Coons have "chronic have-not-itis". They pride themselves on saying that they can do ok even though they are the have not. It gives them an excuse to not be more. It seems rational that you may not be the best you can be, because you were deprived of the finer things. But evolutionist and creationist agree, man came from dirt. So if even dirt can evolve to single celled organisms, and those organisms can evolve to eventually become man, ain't no fuckin reason in the world that you shouldn't be able to go from broke to at least respectably stable. Unless you have settled for wretchedness.
10) Poor parenting. These kids are fucked up and its the parents fault. Your kid can't count, but he got on dunks. Your daughter is filthy, but you out at the club spending $10 per shot on don julio. Your kids don't have uniforms, but you have an IPhone. They don't know how to brush their own teeth, but you have you tube videos of them doin the stanky leg and the single ladies dance. The sins of the father are passed on to the son. So how do you expect your children to develop under your selfish, shortsighted, simple minded ass. What nutty ass logic, causes you to laugh when your child uses profanity. How do you send your child upstairs to play on the internet, while you bustin down some nigga cause "he got swag"? How the fuck do you expect that child to have any kind of moral fiber, when you will sit with them and watch A Real Chance at Love, but won't take them to church? You will get up at 4 am to embarrass yourself on american idol, but wont sit with them at 4pm to help with their home work. You spend $300 a month on liquor, but won't invest to put them in an after school program. Where are your priorities. Bad parenting is the the soil that the seeds of modern coonery is planted in. Its probly too late for you. But damn at least give the kid a chance to not follow in your niggerish ways.
Coons beware. Your days are numbered. You have been measured, you have been weighed and you have most definitely been found wanting. We are coming for you. Your time is shorter than Lil Zane's career. We will find you. Join us or perish sweater monkies.
Dell Out
