9.19.2009

Dear Derek

Once again we meet and as usual, you blame me for the reason that you feel the way you do. I understand that heart and mind may disagree, but it's up to you to get them on the same level. Meaning that you need to get them both playing on the same team if you truly want to be happy.

I know there are relationships that begin and end daily. Most of those individuals are just as lost as you are. They too need to get things together within themselves. But enough about them, let's focus back on you. I'm going to get to the bottom of why you and I butt heads over the years.

First of all, you find yourself attracted to those that do more harm than good. The ones that wouldn't throw water on you of your soul was on fire. The ones that spit a good game but their style states otherwise. I gave you opportunities with those that mattered. Those that were there for you through good and bad. You let them get away. All they wanted was your love. You gave them that and then things went sour.

So instead of blaming me, you need to check yourself. Trying to advance but you can't steal second with your foot on first. Yeah that was a Budden line, but it applies to you. Stop looking for the worst and appreciate what you have from the start. Allowing your insecurities to get the best of you, will have you alone in the long run. Young fool will turn into old fool.

Sincerely,

Love

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This was beautiful Derek and sounds like it was written to me. I can relate all to well. I always blame love for my mistakes in relationships but I always entered the bad ones wearing rosy colored glasses. Oblivious to the harm that they would bring.

But, I also would often have people in my life that truly cared for me and I would distance myself from them. It's a funny thing in retrospect to look back and say what should have been done differently. I think all I can do is move forward and try not to repeat the same mistakes.

This was a very open and touching post! Thank you.

Jennifer said...

Wow, I think you spoke to most of us here! Well written my friend, thanks for putting your heart on your sleeve. We learn a bit about ourselves and you this way!